


In The Deepest Depths I Lost Myself

by comicfanperson



Category: RWBY
Genre: Angst, Conversations, Gen, Hurt Oscar Pine, Oscar Pine Needs a Hug, Ozpin Cares, Ozpin is doing his best
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-05
Updated: 2020-05-05
Packaged: 2021-03-02 20:53:28
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,043
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24023149
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/comicfanperson/pseuds/comicfanperson
Summary: When all hope is gone, they still manage to keep going.
Relationships: Ozpin & Oscar Pine
Comments: 5
Kudos: 84





	In The Deepest Depths I Lost Myself

**Author's Note:**

> i wrote this like,,,, a month ago bc i have a Lot Of Feelings and just found it again in my file. so uhhh... enjoy? I guess???

The snow and the wind beat against Oscar’s face as he trekked through the cold depths of Solitas. He must have been out here for hours now, yet it had felt like minutes. He felt so tired, so cold, so  _ alone.  _ Ozpin being back nearly made the loneliness  _ worse,  _ it simply served as a dark reminder of what had happened a  _ lifetime  _ ago. The old wizard would have never returned if it wasn’t for the violent measures Ironwood had taken, and that hurt Oscar so bad. It made his heart ache, it made him yearn for the comfort of his aunt, for a mug of hot cocoa and a warm blanket and an even warmer story. 

The wind picked up, blowing even further across the landscape, it bit at his face and seeped through his coat. Oscar could barely feel his fingers now. Everything just hurt, from his soul to his toes it all just  _ hurt.  _ Ironwood’s betrayal, Ozpin’s resurgence, JNR leaving him behind barely strong enough to save  _ himself-  _

_ Oscar. _

The teen sighed with the weight of a thousand lifetimes gone wrong. 

“Not now, Ozpin.”

_ We can’t keep putting it off, not with the state you’re in right now.  _

Oscar huffed, “There’s nothing I have to say to you.”

_ Then let me speak.  _

A moment of heavy silence sat between them. The only audible thing was the snow crunching beneath Oscar’s red boots and his short, soft breaths. In all honesty that was the last thing Oscar wanted to do right now. Listening to Ozpin was, essentially, the quickest way to go crazy in this situation of being alone in the middle of a frozen nowhere. Oscar mulled over the idea, the snow and ice crusting over his eyebrows as he walked, full-bodied shivers taking over him, hands rubbing up and down his arms quickly as if it would actually generate some form of heat. 

And still, there was nothing better to do than wander around hopelessly in a hopeless tundra. 

“Fine.”

_ I shouldn’t have done that to you, Oscar.  _

“No dip, Sherlock,” Oscar muttered, kicking a stick a few feet ahead of himself. It bounced and rolled, and Oscar wished so badly that he was that stick. Purposeless and lost, but in the place that it belonged.

_ You needed me and I wasn’t there. That was not okay in any form of the word and for that I am deeply sorry. _

Ozpin’s words caused Oscar to stop in his tracks. 

“Sorry?” he whispered, his heart feeling like a gaping, open wound, “You’re  _ sorry?” _

_ Oscar- _

_ “ _ You abandon me for months on end, not a single word, not a single  _ feeling,  _ and you’re… sorry?” he sucked in a deep breath, tears clouding his vision as he wrapped his arms tightly around himself, the chattering of his jaw making it hard to say the exact words that he wanted to, “I was terrified, Ozpin! Everyday I would wake up in that school and pray to the Gods that wouldn’t be the day you came back! You wanna know why?  _ Do you _ ?”

_ Tell me, Osc- _

“It’s because I didn’t want them to hate us! I didn’t want you to come back just so everybody else could start telling us what to do and how to feel and how to act. I wanted us to be a team, Ozpin. I wanted us to work together and figure out how to best complete our mission, but I couldn’t see that happening in a place where we’d automatically become the bad guys all over again.” 

_ Oh, Oscar… _

“How were we supposed to be helpful in a place where nobody cared? How were we supposed to do anything to stop a downfall that clearly already started long before we even got  _ near  _ Atlas?”

Oscar sniffled and wiped angrily at his dripping nose, his tears falling to the snowy ground, and Oscar soon found himself following them.

“I wanted you to be honest with me, Ozpin, but you  _ left.  _ You left me alone with strange people in a stranger place and I just… I just couldn’t do it anymore.”

_ I know. And I’m sorry. But… Well, I’m here now, and I promise you that I won’t leave. We can still do this.  _

Osca shook his head viscously, “No, we can’t. What’s the point in doing it now, anyways? Huh? What do we do now? Ironwood has probably already told everybody we’re dead.”

Ozpin sighed softly, tiredly,  _ We do now what each incarnation has always done- We keep pushing forward. Oscar, you and I still have a job to do. Despite how we feel personally, despite how everyone around us feels, we have a job.  _

“What  _ job,  _ Ozpin? The one that has us save a world that’s already given up?”

_ Tell me, Oscar, who… who is it that you love the most in this world? _

“M-My… My aunt-t,” he stuttered out, a soft sob breaking off his lips.

_ Why? _

“S-She’s kind. No one is as kind as her. A-Aunt Em-m is kind but in t-the rough exterior-r way. She’s r-rugged and sticks to her b-beliefs no matter what.”

_ And who is it that you hate the most in this world?  _

“S… Salem.”

_ And why is that? _

“She’s s-selfish. She only c-cars about herself, a-about getting what  _ she  _ wants. T-There’s no room in her h-heart for anyone else. N-Not anymore.”

_ That’s why we do this. That’s why we have always done this.  _

Oscar nodded stiffly, and pressed his face into the crook of his elbow. 

“Ozpin… I’m r-really tired.”

_ I know, Oscar, but we must keep going.  _

He sobbed, hot tears streaming down his cold, red cheeks, “I can’t, Ozpin. I can’t do this anymore.” 

_ Then let me.  _

The offer shocked Oscar to his very core. It had been so long,  _ so so long _ , and Oscar couldn’t quite remember how it felt to exist just as a mind, to not have a body to control. But this one was shaking and frozen to the bone, so it didn’t matter. Not anymore. 

“Okay,” he whispered. 

It all came as a shock, the transition shaky and not very well-controlled, but it happened. They did it. And they could keep doing it, just like this. For the rest of their life, like Ozpin had promised.


End file.
